Many will tell you to “do work you enjoy.” But how do we figure out what that is? What does joy even feel like? How do we distinguish it from pleasure or excitement? Is it realistic to demand joy from our work?
The common advice is to think back to your childhood. When you had no bills to pay, no expectations to meet, and no reputation to guard. Ideally, it was a relaxed time, allowing you to have naturally gravitated to the things you enjoy.
But this thought-exercise doesn’t always help.
Our memories may be vague, and the things we did as a kid may not seem to translate to anything we could pick up today.
Continuing our search, we may look to the things we do ‘for fun’ as an adult, and wonder if those are what we enjoy. Shopping, beach vacations, binging shows, whatever.
But those are not it either. Activities like that may help us take a load off. They might give us a break from whatever stressful stuff we do the rest of the time. But that’s not the same as joy.
So, what does joy feel like? How do we recognize it?
Here are some pointers:
We tune in, not out.
When we are enjoying ourselves, we are alert. We have our full attention on the activity we’re doing. We’re not passively consuming, we are actively creating.We can keep coming back
A project we enjoy is one we can look forward to getting back to, because we find genuine pleasure in it. It allows us to feel unrushed, unworried, yet focused and engaged.We find peace in the process
Joy is like a relaxed state of exploration. It is not a manic sense of glory and adrenaline, nor is it about ‘grinding it out.’ Joy is not about sacrificing your current well-being for future success. It is about gentle satisfaction at every stage.
We allow ourselves to be surprised
Rather than demanding that we show up to make something happen, joyful work allows us to show up with wondering what will happen. We don’t have to control every part of it, so we get to delight in the way things unfold.
We take comfort in the stability
Joyful work is varied, because new insights or angles appear as things evolve. But there is a sense of stability underneath. Knowing that you can keep coming back to the work, there is comfort in being able to take refuge any time.
Joyful projects are out there, and they are worth looking for.
If we ourselves to follow our curiosity, we will find them. At that point, it is key to recognize them, make room for them in our lives, and nourish our connection to them.
In a world that values hard work, pushing, and great effort, it can almost feel wrong to do something we genuinely enjoy. We can end up suspicious it, or tell ourselves that we’re being selfish. But we can allow ourselves that pleasure.
Because when we do what we enjoy, we put joy into the world.
And that’s the whole point.